Love is not what you say, it’s what you do.
How are you doing on the 14 Day Love Challenge?
Depending on when you started you have already practiced being Patient and Kind. For those who began the Challenge on February 1st, today is a day to be mindful of Arrogance. Ouch.
My friend, Mike Queen, always says, “Love is not what you say, it’s what you do.” Love is more than a feeling or a sentiment. It is active and intentional.
Words matter, of course. Especially today as you are mindful that, “Love is not arrogant or boastful.” But love is more than words.
Love is a commitment to a way of being. A way of putting others first. A way of building others up. A way modeled by Jesus.
Putting Love Into Practice
Sometimes it is in our closest relationships that we need to be the most intentional about putting love into practice. With our spouse or our parents or our children. We like to believe that, because we love this person, our words and behaviors will just naturally follow suit. But, of course, it is often in those relationships where we feel most secure that we begin to take things for granted.
As you continue to take the 14 Day Love Challenge in these days leading up to Valentine’s Day, consider making a special investment of time and energy and thoughtfulness in the relationship that means the most to you using one of these two possibilities:
1 Corinthians 13 Conversation
The 14 Day Love Challenge is about mindfulness in your thoughts and actions as expressions of love toward all people. A way of being like Jesus in the world.
The 1 Corinthians 13 Conversation is about sitting down with one person, one relationship that you want to invest in more deeply.
- Read through 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 together, pausing after each phrase.
- Affirm in the other person one of the descriptors of love that they are really good at. Have them do the same for you.
- Identify one of the descriptors of love that you would most like to experience. Share a specific way the other person could show you that expression of love. (i.e., a way they could show you more kindness or patience) Invite them to do the same and to ask something of you.
- Ask God to let you be channels of his love through you, especially for this other person.
Take a Relationship Check In
Sometimes conversations about our relationships are difficult to start on our own. Prepare/Enrich is an assessment tool that I use in pre-marital counseling. It covers topics like:
- Conflict Resolution
- Family Relationships
And while it is great as you are preparing to get married, I find it an even better tool to use with couples as a Relationship Check In.
With Prepare/Enrich, both individuals take an online assessment. The report generated gives you a snapshot of your relationship, areas where you are in agreement or disagreement on topics like those listed above, as well as exercises you can do together to talk about those areas.
An online tool like this is a helpful conversation starter. It gives you a common language to talk about topics that might otherwise feel too sensitive topics to bring up and a way to better understand one another’s point of view.
The cost of $35 is what Prepare/Enrich charges for the assessment and report. As a certified facilitator, the assessment report comes to me first. When I forward the report to you I will add some thoughts on how to lean on your faith as you invest in one another, based on the areas identified. I am also available to help you to process the results, if you would like.
Whether you have a 1 Corinthians 13 Conversation on your own or decide to do a Relationship Check In, I hope you will use this season when love is in the air to invest in those you love the most.